As I sit here on this glorious Wellington day, Two years after initiating this business, and my complete overhaul healing journey - rewriting this 'About Me' section - I'm in such awe and gratitude for what my life has become.
Gratitude is the emotional signature that an event has occurred in your life - and for me, there have been many events.
From a young age I felt destined for more, I just had this inner knowing that life isn't what we are shown. I wasn't sure what the destination was, but I faced an immense amount of challenges along the way to get it.
The truth is, I wouldn't change a single part - they have all been a gift and I truly believe that.
From a young age I had already been exposed to the judicial system with my own lawyer as I went through parental custody battles (me as the child) - honestly something that I don't overly wish for any child. A draining experience in a broken system (back then anyways) that really doesn't listen to that of a child’s wants or needs.
At the age of 12, 16 days before my Birthday - my brother unexpectedly passed away, taking his own life due to an anti-acne medication that reacted with him.
It lead me down this path of holistic wellness - how could we care for ourselves without the need for shoving medication into our bodies?
Like how often do we go to the GP for $50 to be prescribed Panadol?
I went through school trying my best, but ultimately in a very disruptive state as a child unaware of how to deal with my emotion, and grief.
Told how I asked too many questions and how I needed to be quite. But I had a fire deep within me that I wanted change.
Behind the scenes, I was being initiated into Reiki level 1, 2 & 3 from the ages of 14-16, and on the scenes of school life I was fighting the school system who tried to tell me I couldn't do a speech on my brother because of the nature of his passing.
Well, that wasn't going to stand. You don't silence a child/teenager who had been through something like that and was trying to help educate around suicide.
Finally getting the opportunity to speak my truth.
As a teenager, I volunteered for a charity called CASPER - Community Action on Suicide Prevention Education and Research.
I was in charge of the youth sector - helping guide and hold space for youth who had lost someone through suicide, or who had attempted to take their own life.
I did that for about 2 years before moving on.
Out of high school I ended up becoming a smoker - I think because of the stress that I had in my life. Again, not exactly sure how to deal with it, the easiest option is avoidance through substance abuse.
Sex also became a major part of my life - due to the lack of self-love that I had. Sex was my coping mechanism for loneliness, something that I was exposed to in every moment someone wasn't around. This void of love for self, filled with sex, my perception of love.
After a few years - this turned into relationships, and at the age of 20 I had my first same sex relationship and came out to my mum as gay.
It was very freeing, and meant not hiding a big part of myself from the world.
What I didn't realise though was that void that was being filled by sex, was no longer filled by sex, but now relationships.
All taught me something different about myself - and the 'good and bad' of what I'm capable of.
At the age of 22, I got engaged to my boyfriend at the time. In which we were engaged for a year.
The breakup caused me to spiral into a space of self-sabotage and I led myself down a dark path for about 7 months of drugs, alcohol and gambling.
At the end of 2019 finally 'waking up' and realising the change I had to make, and the person I wanted to be.
I was in so much debt at the time. A huge cloud over my head. A job I couldn't stand anymore, and a body that felt like it was going to shut down.
It was either staying all of that, or choose different, and that different had to be this soul aligned journey.
So I chose me.
I said fuck it to everything.
Having no idea of how it was going to work or where the money was coming from - but I just knew I had to do it for me.
What a 2 years it's been.
The pain of healing
The pleasure of healing
It hasn't been easy, but boy has it been worth it. It has been the best two years of my life. And now I run a 6 figure business helping others reunite with their spark, their soul and leave their legacy.